I am not ashamed to admit it: I love Star Trek. I can't remember a time when I ever thought it was dumb, silly, or worthless (yes, I did watch Voyager). I have been watching Star Trek for most of my entire life. I always dreamed about what it would be like to in that world. I craved it. But I was careful never to become one of "those" people. Well this last weekend I came as close as I have ever come to stepping in to that magical world.
I entered the world of The Star Trek Experience.
(warning this is a long read - If you would prefer a video wrap up by Jon, that is far shorter,
I should probably begin with my companion for the trip: Jon. He, like I, has been a fan of Star Trek (and most Science Fiction) for most of his life. It was he who finally compelled me to take a 6 hour step down to the Las Vegas Hilton's Star Trek Experience. You see, it is closing on September 1st 2008. If we didn't go now, then we would never get to see it. So I put everything aside, left work early on a Friday, and drove down to Vegas with Jon.
I had only three majors goals for our trip: 1. go to the Star Trek Experience, 2. Eat a Las Vegas buffet, 3. Eat at In-N-Out. Lucky for me, we were able to accomplish goal number three Friday night in St. George. So freaking good! Jon was gracious to drive pretty much the entire way as I was exhausted.
We got in to Vegas around 11pm (midnight to us). After a bit of panic trying to figure out where Jon's sister lived (yeah, he actually had a map to her house because he couldn't remember the 30 other trips he had made there) we were able to melt out of the car (middle of the night - had to be in the upper 80's, easily). Jon's sister was so nice in letting us crash at her house. We got some much needed rest. In the morning we decided that since we were going to be at the Hilton for the STEXP that we should just eat there.
The last time I had eaten at a casino buffet was back in high school when my parents and I were driving to Utah and we stopped at the Reno Circus Circus. So I knew I wanted to do a Vegas buffet. But since it was a weekend, we got upgraded to a Brunch!! I felt like a High Roller (and for the price of $18 a meal, I was). It was great. I got to have fresh fruit, eggs, Carls Jr. curly-fries flavored hash browns, banana cream pie, and cake. Jon chose a healthy variety of fruit (which included both fresh fruit and dried papaya - gross), apple crepes, crab legs, prime rib, eggs benedict, bagel, and a chocolate cake. It wasn't until after our meal, sitting with very full bellies, that we realized that we got screwed on our meal. As part of the meal you get complimentary wine, beer, and spirits. We don't drink. So Jon and I maybe ate about $8 worth of food. Oh well. But we got them, since we inhaled all the second hand smoke we could ask for and we didn't have to buy any cigarettes. Suckers!
So we then made our way over to the entrance of the STEXP, only to find that there was a huge line. Turns out that Star Trek is pretty popular. While waiting we got to see a Ferengi named Rog'L. We also got to spend time next to "our kind." Yeah, they were almost exactly what you think they might be. But at least it was well ventilated. So a 30 min wait in line got us to a cash register that required $49.99 for us to live out our dream. Totally worth it. It got us an open pass to go through the ST museum and ride on each "ride" as much as we wanted.
The two "rides" (more like live action interactive shows of awesomeness - but that is too wordy for marketing purposes) were The Borg Invasion and The Klingon Encounter. Both involve live action actors who make you part of the scene. I didn't much care for the Borg Invasion as it involved 4D. Which basically meant that we wore 3D glasses, had air blown in our face, and parts of our seat poke us in the back and legs (though it was quite funny to hear Jon and several other people scream like girls). And on top of that, the story had Admiral Janeway saving us. Admiral? Come on who makes
her an Admiral?!!! She sucked as a Captain. Good thing that the Klingon Encounter rocked the freakin' house. (See the appendix for a full rundown of that LAISA) Long story short,
I got to be on the bridge of the greatest starship ever made: the Enterprise NCC: 1701D! I almost passed out for not breathing I was so excited. The Starfleet Lt walked right past me. I think she wanted me. It ended with a Disneyland Star Tours type ride. I loved it so much. I felt bad for the blind ladies who went in after us. I wonder what they saw?
After the rides we were then "transported" (they just put us in a elevator) back up to the main floor of the STEXP. Now the next part of our trip may have induced us to spend some money, but unfortunately they had closed down all but one of the shops. So instead of throwing money at kindly red-shirted cashiers, we were left with one lowly shop of lame trinkets, year old calendars, action figures, and ridiculously overpriced paintings. I am willing to admit that I wanted a Starfleet uniform. And I was supposed to find an original Star Trek series female skirt for a friend who shall go unnamed to protect "her" identity. But it was still fun to look at it.
The last stop was Quarks Bar. We had to wait in line a bit to be seated but it was cool because Jon got to meet an actress from an original series episode. I think she looked hotter now than she did when she was younger. We almost lost our place in line because he talked to her for so long. The service was a little slow but the food was pretty good. I had the Hamborger and Jon had the Picard's Pockets, with a starter of the Holy Rings of Betazed (onion rings). I made the horrible mistake of ordering the pasta salad instead of the french fries. Ugh, so gross. They had a drink called the Warp Core Breech that I wanted so bad, but it was only an alcoholic beverage, so I couldn't have it. Honestly we weren't that hungry as it had only been 4 hours since we had eaten at the buffet, but you can't turn down a realistic replica of an owned and operated Ferengi restaurant.
So we then decided to wrap things up. I took one last look at the hanging Enterprise D (no that was not a euphemism) and slowly walked out of that magical kingdom. Just so we are clear, I know that Star Trek isn't actually real. (but if it is real, at least I will be prepared) As a young kid ST really sparked my imagination. It became my escape when sometimes my life just sucked. Mock me if you will, but I had the time of my life. I had such a good time that I decided to make the purchase I had been dreaming about for years. I spent a little over $300 for the entire Next Generation series on DVD. No you can't borrow it!
Peace and Long Life.
*LAISA Appendix
So we are ushered in to this small room where the employee asks us to stand in rows and watch a safety video. He makes a few half hearted jokes (frankly he was trying too hard to hit the punch line, just relax and let the comedy flow Jerry [I just assumed his name was Jerry]). He hits the button to "start" the video and everything goes black. (at this point I forget that there is any one else around me and that I am the only person here) I feel a cool breeze and when the lights come on I am standing on a transporter pad looking at a real Starfleet Lieutenant. She explains that there was a problem and that I should not worry. She then speaks over the communicator and tells Commander Riker that she has me. (it's at this point that I first realize that she wants me). He responds that she should bring me to the bridge.
She escorts me out the transporter room and down a corridor. It was just like the real corridor. It made me remember one thing: why the hell didn't people run down the corridors when there was an emergency? I mean, come on, it's a freaking Red Alert. Run like your life is on the line. Anyway, the door opened and I was led on to the coolest place I have ever stood: the bridge of the Enterprise D. I seriously forgot to breathe for a while. It was a complete replica (or maybe it was the real thing - no way to be certain) of the bridge. The three command chairs, the two navigational stations, the security post, various science/engineers work stations, and the view screen. I got to stand two feet away from where Worf stood. I wanted to reach out and touch them, but they had a strict no touching policy.
Commander Riker then came on screen and informed me that a Klingon ship was after a member of Captain Picard's family in the past, and that they had interrupted the transport thus rescuing me. But when I came on board Captain Picard mysteriously disappeared. The Klingon's then came on screen and threatened us, but Comm Riker wasn't having any of it. He told me that he was going to find where the Klingon's had hidden the time portal and get me home. I was taken in to the turbolift to be brought down to an awaiting shuttle. While in the lift we were fired upon thus making it a very bumpy ride. Once more down a corridor and then I entered a shuttle bay where I could see a screen of Lt Geordi La Forge telling us that he would be accompanying us in another shuttle to protect us.
We strapped in and took off. The Klingon's pursued, but thanks to some expert flying in a nebulae and some very sophisticated machinery, we found the time portal. We flew back through to our current time only to find that the Klingon's had followed. Damn them!!! We flew around downtown Las Vegas trying to evade them only to have the Enterprise show up at the last moment to destroy the cruiser. (not sure how the remains of a Klingon Cruiser aren't going to seriously screw up the time line, but oh well) I was then returned to the Hilton and received a hearty thanks from Captain Jean Luc Picard himself before they flew back in to the time portal.